Pictures

Second Draft

Mingze Sun

Honors First-Year Seminar

Carol Severino

Second Draft

It is an exciting day. I will go hiking with my classmates and Carol. It is about half hour drive from Iowa City to our destination-Carol’s house. It was raining heavily last night, so I thought the field trip would be canceled. In the morning, it is still cloudy, but magically it is sunny again in the afternoon.

In the SUV on the way to our destination, I am thinking about the trip. Will I meet many difficulties? Who will lead the trip and who else will I meet? In this half hour drive, I think a lot about the trip, and my expectations are quite wonderful. I imagine that we will walk slowly when a breeze blows over me. We can see different kinds of flowers and many kinds of plants. I can hardly wait to take pictures for the beautiful sight. In the forest, the air is fresh, and my classmates and I are bathed in sunshine. Walking through the forest easily, we arrive at the lake where we can enjoy the scenery of the lake and have a rest. After that, I expect that we will leisurely eat s’mores and share our feelings.

However, it is not like what I imagine. When we get out of the car, my sight is filled with the yellow color of the leaves on the trees and on the ground. It is reasonable because it is already late autumn. Then my classmates and I walk to the backyard, and we sit for a while and eat some trail mix. Getting everything ready, we start our hiking. Mike, who is Carol’s son, is our leader of this trip, and we just follow him. Millie, Carol’s granddaughter, also goes with his father. It is a little bit of mysterious when we walk to an entrance and go in. I think it will like a maze, but it is just a long straight way to walk through. First, I don’t feel the leaves are wet, but when I walk for a while, my shoes get muddy and wet. Also, because the path is really narrow, we have to walk single file. It is noticeable that two sides of the path are really steep. We are in a ravine, which is a little like we are walking a tightrope. On two sides, I can see that there are also many trees and much grass and they grow in different directions since no one prunes them.  Even though two sides are steep, the leaves also cover the land on both sides. I feel really tired. It is not because the path is really long but the path is hard for me to walk on when it is so muddy, and I momentarily stumble against the tree branches.

 Finally, we arrive at the shore of the lake. I like this place, but I also hate it. The reason I like this place is that the waves are really beautiful here under the sunshine. I hate it because lady-bugs are flying around me and even fly onto my clothes and my neck. I thought I could have a good rest by the lake, but I don’t because I am bothered by the lady-bugs. The smell is fishy and I can hear the sound of engines. I see that there is a small motor boat on the lake pulling a person after it, who sits on something like a seat. When the boat speeds up, that person and his seat spray up above the lake. It is kind of like surfing. I guess that person lives nearby the lake. Many of my classmates say, “Look at that. That’s awesome!” I say, “That person is sitting on a seat.” Then, Carol explains to us that we would have been able to walk along the lake, but we cannot do that now because the water in Coralville Lake has flooded. I can also see the oak and maple trees. The green, red, orange, and yellow trees and the lake constitute a harmonious natural scene. Interestingly, we are also skimming rocks. Mike shows us how to skim. Some of my classmates try to skim rocks, but they are not good at it.

 After we stand on the lakeshore for a moment, we walk back over the same route. I think it will just take a few minutes to get back, maybe because I am already familiar with the path. On the way back, Mike tells us, “This tree is an ironwood tree. Its bark is like iron” It’s interesting for me, because I don’t know much about natural science. After passing by the ironwood tree, I see that Mike carries Millie on his shoulders. It makes sense since Millie is only a 6-year-old girl. When we return to the entrance. Carol said, “We have enough time to hike to the Girl Scout Camp. So let’s go.” Therefore, we keep walk to another path, where is nearby Carol’s house.

We keep walking. I see some mushrooms around the tree root. So I ask Carol, “Do you know how to recognize whether the mushrooms are poisonous?” Carol replies, “I don’t know how to recognize them but my husband can. In some stores, it costs 20 dollars for one bag of mushrooms called morels, and they pick them up from the forest.” I am thinking: it is same situation in China. In China, most people also buy mushrooms from stores since they don’t know how to recognize the poisonous mushrooms. 

Then Carol shows us an abandoned shelter. She introduces the history of this abandoned shelter, which I don’t know about. The shelter belonged to the Girl Scouts. In the nineties, their main building burned. Then the Girl Scout Organization abandoned the shelter. To see closely, I can still see the bedstead and some trash. It is not hard for me to imagine that there were some people camping here in the past. After visiting the abandoned shelter, we go back to Carol’s backyard again.

We are sitting around the table and prepare to eat s’mores together. At the same time, I feel itching behind my left ear. I think it is a bee sting, but I didn’t realize I had a bee sting until I feel itchy. It makes me feel uncomfortable because it is swollen. I show it to Carol and my classmates. After they see it, they exclaim, “Oh my god!” Carol immediately brings the gel and some pills for itching and swelling. I say “thank you” to Carol, apply the gel, and put the pills in my pocket. However, finally, we eat the s’mores and have the drink, and Carol takes us back to Iowa City.

It is true that I have met some tough experiences like tiring walking, being disturbed by the lady-bugs, getting a bee sting, but it is also true that we finally eat the s’mores and finish the trip. Thinking back to what I have experienced, my memory shows me the happiness about the skimming rocks, the ironwood tree, and eating s’more, but also the struggling from muddy path, lady-bugs and bee sting. It is true that we have different trips in our lives, but we should really think whether or not we learn something meaningful. In my view, life is like the experiences of the trip. We could meet all kinds of difficulties, but if we keep going, we will finally arrive where we want to arrive.

            It is my first time to go hiking in the US. I have been living in the Iowa City-Coralville area for a long time; however, I have never been to the forest or on a field trip. Hopefully, I will have another field trip with my friends or family again in the US. Even though I could be suffering or uncomfortable, I believe it will be meaningful and memorable, and I can learn something from the trip.

 

Final Essay Proposal

For my final essay I have two ideas. I would like to expand my scene of struggle piece. I gained some useful feedback in class when I shared it. I want to go more into depth on the trip and the day I wiped out. I am the main character and would add more dialogue for my brother and dad. The theme will probably be around my family. My other option for a story is to talk about my trip to Canada this past summer. I will either focus on visiting Niagara Falls or a food tour we took. The main character would be me but I could talk about people in our tour group or my family. The theme would be being very fortunate to have these opportunities and realizing that during the moment.

Final Travel Essay Proposal

For my Final Travel Essay, I would like to talk about my trip to the Bahamas in 2014. The places we visited provide phenomenal images for me to describe, different cultures for me to explore, cultural clashes. I would speak of the time I spoke with a man about the collar in my shirt, and then transition to John Hammar, and ex-U.S. marine who was held hostage in - of all places – Mexico. I would use my story to show my growth through a simple but important message: the value of people, and of the appreciation of beauty as natural art. I think that of all the trips I have ever been on, this one provides more material for me to work satisfactorily. 

Final Essay Proposal

For my final essay, I have narrowed myself down to two options - I can either expand on my Cross- Cultural Encounter with Dialogue piece or write about my first midwestern camping trip I just recently experienced this past weekend. The former has already been workshopped by y'all and would still only feature myself and my then closest friend Zoe meeting each other for the first time while exploring themes pertaining to societal assimilation, identity and humility. The latter would feature myself and a small group of friends camping out in a nowhere park about 20 minutes from here. In this story, I would capture the quirky intricacies of setting up camp, the sincerity of sharing stories by the lakeside and the innocent stupidity of young adulthood. Its themes would most likely reflect the epochal nature of life and the comfortable simplicity of friendship.

Final Essay Proposal

For my final essay I want to write about my trip to Pasadena, California for the Rose Bowl. I"m not sure what my story will tell yet but I'm thinking about my revolving it around one specific my dad said, "I took you guys to this game so that one day when I'm old and gross you'll take your kids, and hopefully me, back to the Rose Bowl." I think my theme will revolve around family but I'm sort of hoping I find that theme along the way. The characters I'll include will be my brother, sister and dad. I'm definitely going to include waiting for the game to start and possibly the tailgate. I may also include the travel troubles we endured just to get to the game but i'm not sure. I don't think this will be a super dialogue based story.

Final Essay Proposal

For my final essay, I would like to write about going for a run with my tour guide while I was in Geneva. It was just the two of us, so I will include him as a character besides me, as well as some people we passed on the sidewalks. I want to highlight the idea that slow travel (running, walking, biking) allows travelers to truly experience where they are, whereas a car or plane would be a barrier. Since there wasn't much dialogue between my tour guide and I as we ran, I won't be including too much, but the little conversation that we did have I will include. Some scenes will include the difficulty of running up Geneva's incredibly steep hill, stopping for a break at the Reformation monument, and running through the city itself. I'll describe how cold it was, how unfamiliar I was with the path--which contrasted to my runs at home--and my thoughts as I was running.

Final Essay Proposal

For my final travel essay, I am going to write about the field trip with Carol. The field trip is a chance for me to have an intimate contact with nature, especially in the US. In the essay, I will write many different characteristics, including Carol, Carol’s son, my classmates and me. The theme of the trip will reflect that the real field trip is more tiring and harder than my expectations. Also, the theme can indicate that hiking is just like life. People can meet plenty difficulties, but finally they can arrive at their destination.

Final Story Proposal

For my final travel essay, I plan on writing about my trip to Fenway Park. This would be an expansion on my "Describe a Place" essay. It is a narrative story, so the main character in the story is myself, but I will include the interactions I had with my family along with some of the others fans, and vendors that I encountered. The smaller form of the essay was revised in class and given some really great directions to go in. I want to write about family traditions and values and how they play into the love I have for baseball. The overall theme of the essay will be euphoria and how even though sometimes family dynamics are tough, finding a common ground can bring everybody together.

Final Travel Essay

For my final essay, I have two ideas. My first idea is writing about my trip to Pakistan. Specifically, I would focus on my visit to the Anarkali-Liberty market. My second idea is writing about my experience at a Saudi Arabian McDonalds. If I talked about the Anarkali-Liberty market, I would center my theme around the differences between an experienced traveler (my mom) vs a beginning traveler(me). The story would involve a lot of haggling, witty bargaining, and focus on Pakistani market vendors, their various shops, my mom, and I. If I wrote about the Saudi Arabian McDonald's, my theme would center on how people in America are automatically given respect, but in Saudi Arabia respect must be earned--even in a fast food restaurant. I would write about the separate lines for men and women, the different food, the unique seating arrangement, the cashier, and my family and I. The first idea would include Urdu dialogue, but the second idea would include Arabic. All in all, they're both great travel experiences that I would enjoy writing about.

Final Essay Proposal

For my final essay, I will complete the story about my trip to the Snow Village in China. It will include more activities experienced in the trip, such as skiing, and more details, such as backgrounds and descriptions of the place. It is a narrative story, with me being the main character interacting with other characters including my parents, my tour guide, and other people traveled along with. The theme is keeping the curiosity and enthusiasm with whatever one has not experienced in a life adventure, and the scenes mainly take place in the Snow Village.   

Final Story Proposal

For my final essay in this class, I would like to write about an excursion a friend of mine made with me one day while we were on our exchange trip in Germany. The narrative would begin with us leaving our exchange students at their gym class in order to stroll around the small town of Badbergsabern. Annie (my friend) and I would be the main characters of this story, with guest appearances from other students on the exchange, Robert and Johannes. The theme would be something along the lines of finding your own adventures is one of the best experiences imaginable. Scenes would include us leaving the gymnasium, buying overpriced coffee, running into Robert and Johannes, and hurrying across town in order to glimpse the watch tower rumored to stand on the opposite side of Badbergsabern.

Final Travel Essay Proposal

For my final travel essay, I will write about my trip to Saint Martin island that my family took my best friend and me on. I wrote a shorter essay on this trip already (snapshot assignment), and I plan to expand upon it by adding dialogue as well as more detail about the setting, characters, and what happened each day we were on the trip. The characters are my parents, sister, and best friend Lydia. The conflict is jealousy, and the theme is about learning to appreciate what is most important in life rather than worrying about petty things.

Final Travel Essay Proposal

For my final travel essay, I think I'm going to write about my trip to Turks and Caicos this past spring break. The characters will be my best friend, Nichole, and her family, mom, dad, sister, Leah, and brother, Zach, as well as my dad, mom, and I. Specifically, I may add to my story I wrote and work shopped in class about sitting around the table for dinner on the patio. If I don't write about that, I may talk about snorkeling, going along a similar theme as Bicycle Love, where if I wasn't with other people I wouldn't have gone as deep and far out to sea. I would highlight the specific moment when I got to the edge of the coral reef on one side and I just looked ahead and saw complete emptiness and vastness of the ocean. It was terrifying and I was reminded of the beauty and expanse of the ocean. I'll never forget this moment.

Proposal for Final Travel Essay

I'm going to write about my trip to Ecuador with my best friend Maddie, so the story will focus on us two and also include some family members. I'll include what we did during the trip such as going to the rainforest, going to a market, and going to the equator. I'll write about what I wanted the trip to be for Maddie and why it was so important to me, including expectations I had. The conflict at the end will produce the main theme of working past an unexpected conflict.

These Ghosts are Mine

I rather liked this story! The imagery was very vivid (to the point that I would like to ask, do you have a naturally good memory, or do you write descriptions down?)
I enjoyed the changing scenes, which were never too abrupt, and I was able to follow them with ease. The main story with Bethany was very emotionally charged and very well-written, and I appreciated that.

These Ghosts Are Mine Response

The style of Anne-sand’s writing is really creative. She ties the description of ghosts to the story of Bethany and her together. It is really sad when she realizes the relationship between she and Bethany breaks up. She uses ghosts to express that she is really upset. Here is my question. Why does the author describe many different scenes before she tells us her story with Bethany?